[It hasn't yet occurred to him that there is some miscommunication going on. That Isaac was trying to keep anyone from getting hurt, not stopping Dagny from saving someone. Dagny just feels that by getting in the way, Isaac doesn't trust him to be able to do his "job," that now Isaac feels he needs to protect Dagny, which makes putting himself in danger difficult.]
You don't have to get shot to protect people. [There's some frustration in his voice now, not so much at Dagny as at the fact that Isaac feels like he's missing something.]
[Oh. That he does understand. He stops in his pacing, standing near the foot of the bed, quietly breathing for a few moments.] Okay, fine. Sure, sometimes...I might be a tad bit too impulsive with my tactics.
Sometimes. [An echo. He swallows, bringing his hand up to scrub at his face, just trying to put the words together clearly.] And that's okay. If you come back. But I never saw it happen before. I didn't -- I wasn't thinking.
[He watches Isaac quietly, all of the frustration leaving him when he sees how much Isaac is struggling to even talk about all of this. He shouldn't have brought it up right now, maybe not even at all.] It's okay. We can talk about it later...I'm just glad you're alright. [And he does sound glad, even if the smile he tries to give is a little strained. Whatever other emotion he's feeling, it isn't worth arguing about it now.]
[He can't really decide if that's a relief or not. He doesn't really want to keep arguing about it at all, and it'd be nice to just be done with it, but he's also struggling right now. The pain is getting sharper the more the drugs are wearing off, his breathing a little more shallow now, voice a little bit thin when he finally answers.] Okay. Yeah, that's fine.
[He drops his hand, eyes closed, just focusing on trying to breathe through the pain instead once he doesn't have to talk anymore.]
[When he realizes just how much Isaac is struggling, he mentally berates himself for being so cruel to bring it up at all. His feelings don't matter right now, all that matters is the man in front of him, and he is clearly in pain.] Do you need the nurse? Did they give you a drip or anything? You shouldn't be in this much pain. [His hand already reaching for the call button before he gets a response. Whatever they gave him, it's obviously not enough.]
I don't know. It takes a lot for things to work, sometimes. Maybe it wasn't enough. [Mostly Dagny's only seen it with drinking, Isaac can get pretty far before he starts really showing any sign it's hitting him, but it holds true for a lot of other things too. That's forgetting the stuff that flat-out doesn't work on him. He hasn't really used a lot of medication since coming back, but it wouldn't be a surprise to find out it stands for that too.
He frowns a little, looking at the actual equipment around him for the first time before coming up with a button, looking at Dagny as if to verify that's what he's talking about.]
Alright, then we ask for more. They have to have something that would work for you. [He's not actually sure that's the case but it sounds good, and he'd be more than happy to take his stress out on someone else, especially if it was to get Isaac care. (Probably not entirely true, he'd likely feel bad if he was rude to anyone, no matter how stressed he is).
When Isaac lifts up the button, he nods.] Yeah, press it. It's a smaller dose so you can get it more frequently, that way there isn't any lapse between doses. [He takes Isaac's free hand again, giving it a squeeze.] Press it until you don't feel pain anymore.
Right. [He remembers, he's been on the other side of this, sort of, but it's very clear he's not used to being in this situation himself. He'll pause after the first couple of presses, squeezing Dagny's hand gently, before he adds quietly:] If you need to go or anything, that's okay. [It sort of feels important to say it now, because he's not sure how much it's going to take before he feels any better, and he's not sure if he'll be able to fight his unhappiness about it if it sends him for a loop.]
I'm not leaving. [Just like Isaac was adamant not to leave him, he doesn't plan on going anywhere. He squeezes Isaac's hand back, covering it when his other hand and rubbing along his knuckles. Even if he was upset earlier, it doesn't change how much he loves Isaac, he's not going to leave him while he's in the hospital.]
Okay. [There's some relief there despite himself, even as he goes on. He'd rather have Dagny with him, he makes things feel safe and right now that feels sorely lacking, but still.] Just letting you know. If it comes up. [He draws his thumb over Dagny's wristbone, adds quietly:] I love you.
I love you too. [Said with a lot of emotion behind it. Hoping that Isaac knows that was never in question.] I just got scared. I'm not on this side of things often. [Literally never.] But I love you so much. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten upset. [It's clear he's still feeling the anxiety of the day, his emotions bouncing around faster than he has time to process anything. Frustration turning to exhaustion, turning to disappointment with himself for how he's handled it all. He's being a horrible husband, on all levels.]
You can be upset. It's okay. [Matter-of-fact. He relaxes a little bit as the medication starts to kick in with the next press, the edge of the pain beginning to dull, offering Dagny a slight, tired smile.] Everything's going to be fine. I've got you.
It's not okay. Maybe when you're better I can be upset, but not right now. [He smiles slightly, a small one, but more genuine, especially as Isaac seems to relax.] Okay. You've got me. [He lifts Isaac's hand to his lips again, pressing another kiss to his knuckles.]
[He shakes his head, but he's apparently committed to not arguing anymore, because he doesn't actually say anything. He won't blame Dagny for being angry, or being scared. It's exhausting to be on that side of things. Not that this is much better, either.
He tugs gently at Dagny's hand at the kiss, a silent request for him to come closer, his thumb passing back and forth over the side of his hand.] Yeah, I do. [Quiet and pleased.]
[At the tug he moves closer, making sure he isn't going to nudge Isaac or tug any tubes out before sitting on the bed facing him. He takes one of his hands back so he can use it to push Isaac's hair off his forehead, leaning up to kiss the space on his head he exposed, talking quietly.] Okay...just don't do it again. Please.
[His voice cracks again on the please. He can understand where Isaac was coming from, just seeing danger and acting on impulse, after all, that's literally ninety percent of how Dagny handles all his problems. He just can't bare to be in this position again, still feels like it's not actually real, like he could wake up and Isaac will be gone. He doesn't usually get this lucky.]
[He relaxes even further when Dagny's within touching distance, his good leg leaning against him, closing his eyes as he leans in closer. There's still a little pain, but it's dimmer, tolerable. Makes it easier to focus on the comfort of having him there.]
I'll try not to. [His voice is soft, genuine. He doesn't want to promise, doesn't know if he'll be able to fight it any better the next time, but he does mean it. He'll at least try to do it better, if it happens again, so that neither of them end up hurt.]
[He doesn't say anything, just presses another kiss to Isaac's head before leaning back down. He wants to beg, tell him that he literally can't go through this again, but he's pretty sure it wouldn't do any good right now. If he has to stop running into danger to make sure Isaac stays safe then he'll do it. He loves helping people, but he loves Isaac more.
He's quiet as he sits back down, moving his hand back to cover Isaac's in his, trailing it over his knuckles and around his wrist, up his arm, offering safe and comforting touch.] Feeling better?
Sort of. [A pause, as he appears to be genuinely considering, before deciding:] Better enough. This is so much easier.
[He shakes the button slightly to illustrate what he's talking about before setting it down, his other arm relaxed under the touches, holding on to Dagny loosely as long as he stays close.]
Not having all of this. Medicine is really useful. [Said earnestly, like Dagny might not be aware of it, the drugs really starting to fully kick in. It probably still will wear off faster than it should, but at least it just seems to be a matter of amount and not the drugs fully not working on him.]
Yeah, it is. [Said earnestly, and a little sympathetically, sad that Isaac had to go through this alone, and without analgesic.] I'll make sure you are as high as possible for this whole process. You won't feel a thing. [Probably not entirely true, but he will do his best to make sure Isaac remains comfortable, even when he's back home.]
Maybe a couple of things. It'd take a lot to get there. But it's okay, you'll take care of me. [He has utter and complete faith in that fact, and it shows, a little smile on his face as he watches Dagny.]
I will take the best care of you. [He agrees, smiling fondly and squeezing Isaac's hand.] I already gave you my blood. You didn't even have to drink it. [Lifts his arm slightly, not enough to really disrupt any of the holding or touching, just showing off his fun colored pressure bandage.]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2025-03-20 11:21 am (UTC)[It hasn't yet occurred to him that there is some miscommunication going on. That Isaac was trying to keep anyone from getting hurt, not stopping Dagny from saving someone. Dagny just feels that by getting in the way, Isaac doesn't trust him to be able to do his "job," that now Isaac feels he needs to protect Dagny, which makes putting himself in danger difficult.]
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Date: 2025-03-20 11:29 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2025-03-20 10:34 pm (UTC)[He drops his hand, eyes closed, just focusing on trying to breathe through the pain instead once he doesn't have to talk anymore.]
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Date: 2025-03-20 10:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-03-20 10:51 pm (UTC)He frowns a little, looking at the actual equipment around him for the first time before coming up with a button, looking at Dagny as if to verify that's what he's talking about.]
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Date: 2025-03-20 11:00 pm (UTC)When Isaac lifts up the button, he nods.] Yeah, press it. It's a smaller dose so you can get it more frequently, that way there isn't any lapse between doses. [He takes Isaac's free hand again, giving it a squeeze.] Press it until you don't feel pain anymore.
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Date: 2025-03-20 11:09 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2025-03-21 01:20 am (UTC)He tugs gently at Dagny's hand at the kiss, a silent request for him to come closer, his thumb passing back and forth over the side of his hand.] Yeah, I do. [Quiet and pleased.]
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Date: 2025-03-21 01:34 am (UTC)[His voice cracks again on the please. He can understand where Isaac was coming from, just seeing danger and acting on impulse, after all, that's literally ninety percent of how Dagny handles all his problems. He just can't bare to be in this position again, still feels like it's not actually real, like he could wake up and Isaac will be gone. He doesn't usually get this lucky.]
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Date: 2025-03-21 01:41 am (UTC)I'll try not to. [His voice is soft, genuine. He doesn't want to promise, doesn't know if he'll be able to fight it any better the next time, but he does mean it. He'll at least try to do it better, if it happens again, so that neither of them end up hurt.]
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Date: 2025-03-21 02:05 am (UTC)He's quiet as he sits back down, moving his hand back to cover Isaac's in his, trailing it over his knuckles and around his wrist, up his arm, offering safe and comforting touch.] Feeling better?
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Date: 2025-03-21 02:14 am (UTC)[He shakes the button slightly to illustrate what he's talking about before setting it down, his other arm relaxed under the touches, holding on to Dagny loosely as long as he stays close.]
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